Discontent
Brewing resentment and revolving doors
What is the one thing a baby is interested in? Predominantly food. This is the simple idea that drove us to believe people are motivated by individual needs such as food, shelter, money, and sex. The motto of 'give me what I want and I'll be happy' still rings true today. But in the 1960's when researcher Harry Harlow took a baby monkey and gave it the option of two 'fake mothers' the results opened another theory.
One mother constructed of wood with a cloth fur but with no food. The other was made of wire but had a baby bottle of milk to feed from. This highly unethical experiment showed the babies always spent more time with the cloth mother. They would use the wire mother fleetingly for feeding and then scuttle back to the cloth mother. Maybe the cloth mother provided warmth, so to balance things up a warm globe was placed in the wire mother. No change was observed.
This opened up a new idea around affection and connection as fundamental motivators in the animal world, including human societies. This all makes sense in terms of the family unit and where we place our priorities in our communities. But, is it any different in our teams?
In western society we have a tradition of promoting the most technically talented person into leadership roles. The other tendency is to promote or employ the best marketeer (i.e. the best talker in an interview process). This makes sense as these people are easy to assess (high credibility), make it easy for the recruiter (quick and effortless) and give us confidence (familiarity). But humans are not robots. Humans are not rational. And, humans are motivated by more than just transactions. Funnily enough, these people are unequipped to lead professional work environments because they are unable to provide the sense of connection and belonging team members need to perform and endure.
Source: verywellmind.com
Harry Harlow's infamous experiments took baby monkeys away from their mothers at birth and gave them fake surrogates. These babies grew up to become socially disturbed adult monkeys that couldn't fit into monkey societies and suffered high anxiety and displayed aggression. Research since shows us that we have psychological needs beyond the material. Belonging is a real human need leaders can cultivate for better and enduring performance. It may even make us happier and more capable humans in other walks of life.
The cascade of a quick and easy (or as I like to call them, Quick n Dirty) hire into leadership tends to look like this:
Quick n Dirty - the easiest candidate to hire is put in charge of the team. Relief is felt as the task is complete.
Honeymoon'less period - something doesn't sit right with the team. Even they can't pinpoint what it is, but tension is there.
Orders are given but not followed - small power plays unfold. People start doing what they think they should do rather than what the leader has asked. (see Drift, Nov 21)
Resentment builds - perceptions of laziness, incompetence, incompatibility and even sabotage start being flung between characters in the team. It's getting political.
Bust ups - either the leader goes or the trouble maker(s) go. There is collateral damage with lost clients/accounts, other team members leaving or reputations being harmed.
Rinse and Repeat.
A revolving door of talent can become the norm. This is costly, agitating and most critically it is unnecessary. As I write this I can not physically think of one person I have worked with in any capacity that has not experienced this situation. It is an epidemic.
The explosion of Emotional Intelligence literature and programs hones in on this very subject. Daniel Goleman's has lead in this space and I highly recommend his book Primal Leadership on this subject. The professionals with self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationship management ability are the ones most equipped to lead teams. Of course this is not enough on it's own. They need credentials and experience to match the needs of the role as well as planning, communication and inspirational qualities.
When leaders take a deliberate move towards being a social leader for their team an alternative cascade of performance and solidarity is possible. But, without the investment in connection, motivation and care for one's team there will be many winters of discontent to come.
